I appear to be fine

All test results are in. No cancer. No active histoplasmosis or other fungal lung infection. (The doctor says he can't totally rule it out, the fungus may just be inactive right now). Also negative for sarcoidosis.
So I got a haircut. I was putting it off in case I needed chemo again. Why spend all of that money on a haircut if I'm going to lose my hair again. The curls are still there!!! :)
I am finally beginning to get into the holiday spirit. Better late than never. Baking and decorating and wrapping, oh my!

NO LUNG CANCER

Good news. Still waiting on cultures for definitive diagnosis. No steroid injection permitted for the shoulder if it's a fungal infection. Trade-offs.
One final doctor next week - gyno-oncologist. Hopefully she'll have a simple explanation for the intermittent pelvic pain.
It's always something.

results and more

Scan results: abdomen is clear (yay)
Lungs have more nodules than last year. Some are a bit large.
I saw a pulmonologist today and have a bronchoscopy with lung biopsy scheduled for tomorrow. More waiting. More anxiety.

well, well, well

3 month check up last Tuesday. I had some complaint of bloating and my ca125 was up from 16 to 38. Lots of tears, lots of worry. I had a scan on Saturday morning. Lots more tears, lots more worry. Saw an oncologist today (mine is on maternity leave). He says the abdominal cavity is clear, the one spot on the liver is unchanged, there are many more nodules in the lungs and they have changed somewhat. It would be unusual for it to be ovarian cancel - but not impossible. It would be unusual to have a new primary cancer - but not impossible. The oncologist is going to confer with a pulmonologist to determine the proper biopsy technique and then subsequent treatment for whatever is the diagnosis.
Lots of fear!! Hate this!!
But life goes on...

i have returned...

I have returned to the point where I have quite a bit of weight to lose. Food tastes pretty good and I'm kind of lazy so the weight went on easily.

I have returned to my former job at Cincinnati Job Corps. I missed it - crazy stress and all. I'm happy to be back and expect to have everything caught up in...well, some things my never get caught up.

I have returned to bad habits of too much TV and too little exercise. OK, I didn't actually return to these, I never really left.

I have returned to indecision about whether to let my hair grow or keep it short. I still have some curl and I'm kind of afraid I'll lose it if I get a haircut.

That's about it for my return. Nothing spectacular. Not even anything very interesting.

Power of Teal

Today was the Power of Teal walk for ovarian cancer. When I first saw the information on line, I emailed it to my kids and told them that I wanted a team for my birthday. They ran with it. Elizabeth designed a team Tshirt. We kicked around all sorts of potential team names (we didn't think the organization would appreciate "fuck cancer") We settled on "unlikely heroes". I didn't realize until one of the girls told me that it is exactly one year today that we got the word from the oncologist that I was officially cancer free. As I looked around at some of the other teams, I got teary when I saw a team shirt that said "walking in memory of..."  I am so grateful that I was walking with my team.
Today was just perfect!

Friends

I envy people who have a bunch of different friends/groups of friends to hang out and have fun with.